Procrastinate!

U: Hey, what does this word 'procrastinate' mean ??
Me: Hmm... (thinking)... may be... I ll tell you later!

Speed Of Thought!

Me: Yippie! I invented a mechanism to measure the speed of thought!
U: Aha, Whats that?
Me: Hmm... imagine a rotating wheel... imagine it starts at a point and rotates back to that point... imagine every point in between... Now my idea is... speed of thought = distance the wheel rotated in your imagination divided by the time to imagine :)
U: Am done!
Me: So fast :( ?? Hmm... yeah, thats the problem, I cant verify this :(

Mythology!

U: Hey, Adam and Eve were the first humans born! Am wondering who might be the first to die?
Me: Hmm... (thinking...) may be... Yama :)

Instinct!

U: Hey, Why are you looking so depressed?
Me: Hmm... Whenever... a good looking girl in front of me waves her hands "at me", I always have this strange instinct to look behind and... unfortunately I always find a boy there :(

Stuck!

U: Hey, Can you please tell me how you got this result ?
Me: Hmm... Hmm... Hmm... may be... I ll leave it as an exercise!

Office nap!

Me: What do you think of sleeping in office ?
U: What is so new about it? Everybody does!
Me: And then snore :) ?

Haircut!

U: Hey, What happened to your hair?
Me: :( Oh! the barber just eroded over it hairlessly... I mean carelessly!

Stupidity!

U: What could be the height of stupidity ?
Me: Hmm... May be... something like... study hard full night and... could not wake up for the exam !

Time!

U: Hey, your watch is 10 min fast?
Me: Oh is it ? Well, just to make sure am always ahead of time :p

Time lag!

U: Hey, what happened to your watch today? Its now 10 min slow?
Me: Oh is it? Hmm... sometimes you would run it slower for personal satisfaction... when you sit in a classroom :(

AI!

U: So u r taking AI ha? Don't u think thats a stupid topic? Has anything really useful turned out of it since the last 50 years ?
Me: Hmm...(thinking) If I don't take AI, then do you think I ll be smarter than all those geniuses who studied that subject for 50 years ?

in the kitchen!

U: Whats so difficult in cooking?
Me: Nothing is as difficult as cutting onions! It really makes me cry :(

Cute puppy!

Me: Hey, look at that cute little puppy!
U: Wow! its sooo cute !
Me: Lets play football :)

Deadline!

U: Hey, why are you running so confused?
Me: I have a homework due on 20th midnight! Tomorrow is 20th and... And I just realized something... :(

Sleep!

U: Hey, how to figure out if a person is really sleeping?
Me: Hmm... (thinking) Simple... if he snores! People just dont want to snore :)

Univercity!

U: Hey, you wrote the title for this blog wrong!

Me: U too ll make that mistake if you land here.

Day!

U: Hey, how was your day?

Me: Oh, it was awesome till afternoon.

U: After noon what happened ??

Me: Hmm... after noon I came to office :(

Triplet!

U: Today I ve a very interesting question for you :) Frame a sentence in English with more than one word but using only one word!

Me: Hmm... (thinking)... may be a... "can can can" ;)

Electronics!

U: Why do you hate electronics so much?
Me: Its not that I hate electronics... the problem is that I am not able to find that screw!!

Exercise!

U: Tell me the difference between Yoga and Gym?

Me: Hmm... (thinking) Yoga is like vegetarian and Gym would be non-veg!

Tummy!

U: You eat so much and still you dont have a tummy? How??

Me: Hmm... (thinking) may be... bcos I sleep on my stomach :)

The Third Eye!

U: Whats your latest quote?

Me: "Everything in this world is useful atleast twice"!

U: Aha! Prove it if this "thing" is say... this quote itself!

Me: Hmm... "Everything in this world is useful atleast twice" :)

Loser!

U: Hey, I heard you lost the Chess tournament in the first play itself? :p

Me: Hmm... Actually I came second! All rounds were knock outs and I lost to the tournament winner :)

The Clock

U: Hey, your clock has stopped! Won't you ever repair it?

Me: Oh! thats my latest discovery! I am just running it over a blackhole!

Planning!

U: Can you explain me "planning"?

Me: Its like... you go for jogging... you adjust your footsteps in the beginning and althrough... such that when you get back home you should be entering with the right leg!! No Cheating... ok :)

Maggi!

U: Why does it take just 2 minutes to cook maggi?

Me: Hmm... may be bcos... maggi is hot-tempered :)

Helmet!

U: Why don't you ever wear a helmet?

Me: Hmmm... you won't... if on the first day... a fly gets inside it when you are in the middle of traffic!

Puzzle

U: I have a puzzle for you :) Tell me a vehicle which does not have a horn!

Me: Hmm ... (thinking) May be a Concord!

Recursion!

U: Hey, Can you explain me what recursion is?

Me: Try answering these questions... How do you think? How do you think you think? How do you think you think you think?

U: Oooooo... my head is aching...

Me: Yes, that is recursion!

Chicken Pox and Back Pain

U: Hey, you have backpain? Doc told me it is one of the outcomes of chicken pox...

Me: Oh is it? May be... when you get blisters on diagonal points on your back!

Chicken Pox

U: Why the hell is the doc not calling me? Doesn't he know that the more I stand here, the more they will risk the spreading of the disease?

Me: Umm... may be... that is what they want!

Bathing

U: Hey, you should not bathe after dinner! Its scientifically proven that bathing after food will decrease body temperature which slows down digestion!

me: Oops! (thinking) Ok. I ll bathe in warm water.

Pooja Room!

U: Hey, why didn't you take that house?

me: Oh, it did not have a pooja room!

U: But I thought you think there is no GOD!

me: Oops! (thinking...) Yes, I want a house with a Pooja room which I ll keep empty!

Letter games!

U: Hey!! Whats this status in your gtalk mean?

234567890ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTVWXYZ

Are you really crazy?

Me: Missing one and its u!!

Generations!

U: Why do you love me so much?

Me: (thinking...)May be you look somewhat like my mother and I am somewhat like my father. Then why my father loved my mother?? May be because he was like my grandfather and she looked like my grand mother! Then why my grandfather... Oops! Its not my fault!